THINKING ERRORS
Part 1 of 3
Thinking errors are thoughts and
ideas that result from our inaccurate perception of reality. However, when we
use thinking errors we are doing so on purpose. We use thinking errors in order
to avoid taking responsibility for many different reasons. We actually convince
ourselves that we are being honest and truthful when in actuality we are
desperately trying to get out of, avoid, defend, and justify our negative
thoughts and behaviors.
When you are finished
reading over the following 40 thinking errors:
1. List all of the most common ones
you use.
2. Break them down into your top ten
and list them on the pages provided.
3.
Then write a personal example of how you use it and two ways that you can
change this thought pattern.
1.
Anger:
This anger is not real. Rather it is used to control and
manipulate others. When confronted, outrage, anger, etc., are expressed to
divert attention to that instead of the original behavior.
Example: Tantrums,
aggression, retaliation and blaming.
Payoff: The anger
instead of the behavior takes center stage. The behavior that you did does not
get addressed.
Consequence: You
alienate people from wanting to be near you because they don’t want to deal
with you.
2. Avoidance:
This is the belief that it is easier to avoid life’s
difficulties than to deal with them. Avoidance is a way out of your obligations
without having to say you will not be responsible for these things.
Procrastination is a form of avoidance.
Example: I’m going to
make those calls as soon as I finish organizing my desk.
Payoff: You do not
have to take responsibility for being irresponsible.
Consequence: You are
irresponsible. People lose trust in you.
3. Awfulizing:
This is the belief that it is unbearable when things do not
go as you want them to. Anything that takes effort is awful. If something is
awful you have the right to not bear it and to act out in any way that you
want.
Example: I’m unhappy
with the way the schedule goes each day and let everyone know, including patients.
Payoff: You do not have to deal with anything that you label
as awful. You do not have to be uncomfortable.
Consequences: People
avoid you because you complain so much.
4. Binocular Trick:
You magnify or exaggerate the importance of positive
qualities or events connected to other people and minimize your own attributes
and/or achievements. You may do this for one of two reasons:
1. To reinforce your
internalized shame
2. To awfulize your
circumstances so that you can play the victim.
Example: I really
want to go to hygiene school, but I really can’t afford it.
Payoff: You provide
evidence to reinforce your descent into victim stance.
5. Closed Channel:
One of the key tactics you employ to avoid change. An open
channel is essential to good communication. Open channels have three
components:
1) Self-disclosure 2)
Receptivity to feedback 3)
Self-criticism
Example: Given your
uniqueness you do not have to listen to what those “lesser” people have to say.
You are perfect and any mistakes you make are really someone else’s fault.
Payoff: You can keep
doing what you want to.
6. Denial:
A defense mechanism which we use to protect us from painful
aspects of ourselves, others, and/or reality. Denial can be conscious or
unconscious.
Example: I didn’t
forget to file the x-rays. I gave them to someone else to take care of.
Payoff: You do not
have to come to terms with things you do not like since they do not exist. You
do not have to solve problems.
Consequence:
Molehills turn into mountains.
7. Drama/Excitement:
The person using this thinking error will often describe
things in a way to build them up in order to sound powerful or “cool” to
others.
Payoff: Attention,
control.
Consequence: You end
up living in a fantasy world.
8. Emotional Reasoning:
You assume that your negative emotions reflect the way
things really are.
Example: I feel that
Mrs. Jones doesn’t like me working with her.
(I feel, therefore, it must be true.)
Payoff: You do not
have to think things through or look at the possibility that your feelings may
be based on inaccurate information.
Consequence: You make
a lot of bad decisions, which are based on false information.
9. Entitlement:
Since you have suffered you are entitled to be paid back by
life. Everything should be easy for you.
Example: You can’t
believe it when the doctor gave you a written warning for being late; after all
he/she knew you have an old car that breaks down often.
Payoff: You are not
obligated to anyone other than yourself.
Consequence: Your
selfish behavior alienates others.
10. Externalization:
The belief that external events cause all human suffering
and that you must control all events before your life can be better. Your moods are controlled by other people’s
actions and external events.
Example: You are
depressed because it is raining.
Payoff: You are a
victim of circumstance and until circumstances change, you do not have to do
anything to help yourself.
Consequence: You
never change. You do not see yourself as
having any control over your life.
This is an original lesson by Salt Dental Practice Management
